Schmaltzy romance Love Again is currently sitting pretty as the most-watched movie on Netflix in the past week. The film stars Priyanka Chopra Jonas as Mira, a talented children’s book illustrator who struggles to overcome the grief of her boyfriend’s tragic death. When Mira starts texting her beloved ex’s old phone number, she accidentally connects with Rob (Sam Heughan), a handsome and single Scottish journalist working on a Celine Dion profile. With the help of the Canadian superstar and Rob’s own slightly creepy plotting, the two meet and fall in love…and eventually into bed together. The one problem? You know, besides the fact that Rob hasn’t yet shared he’s been on the receiving end of Mira’s romantic missives? Love Again shies away from giving us the steamy love scenes Sam Heughan’s Starz show Outlander is famous for.

Sure, Mira claims she wants to have her way with Rob (and her sister excitedly texts her about getting that “D”), but all we get is a rather chaste cut to the morning after. Rob is shirtless, but pointedly in boxer briefs. Mira and Rob cuddle, but don’t passionately embrace. Love Again tries to depict its characters as adults naturally chasing the high of their instant chemistry, but the chaste editing makes it feel as hot as a Hallmark movie. (That is, not very steamy at all.)

At least Sam Heughan knows what he has to do. As soon as Rob is out of bed, Heughan strips down for a hot and hilarious shower scene. He embraces the moment. He caresses his own face. He sings Celine Dion. It’s not enough, but it’s a gift to those of us feeling the Droughtlander in these trying times — and it’s something for those of us patently confused by Love Again‘s PG approach to its characters’ sex drives…

Written and directed by James C. Strousse, Love Again is an English-language remake of 2016 German film SMS für Dich (which translates to “Text for You”). The film opens on Mira Ray’s picture perfect life, complete with dreamy boyfriend John (Arinzé Kene). Within minutes, however, we watch as Mira witnesses John die before her eyes when a car crashes into him. Cut to two years later and Mira is attempting to rebuild her life with the help of her sister/roommate Suzy (Sofia Barclay). While Suzy aims to push Mira back out into the dating scene — Chopra Jonas’s real life husband Nick Jonas plays a horrible dating app match — Mira is more content to text John’s old cell number with messages about how much she misses him.

What Mira doesn’t realize is that the lovelorn Rob has been reading all of her texts and falling hard for her through them. With the encouragement of Celine Dion and the help of co-workers, Rob pieces together that Mira will be attending an opera in the city. There, the two meet and hit it off. After a magical date that stretches into the morning and a chaste sleepover the following night, Mira makes her move. During a game of basketball, she makes a bet that if she wins, she can go home with Rob and have her way with him. They don’t really play much more basketball after that.

Instead of providing us with a euphoric love scene, we get a shot of these two incredibly beautiful human beings waking up together (mostly) under covers. There’s some cute nuzzling and the suggestion that sex happened. But who knows with these two? They’ve already spent two nights together without bumping gonads. Maybe when Mira said she wanted to have her way with Rob, she envisioned dry humping or semi-nude hugging. It’s difficult to say!

Nevertheless, Sam Heughan tries to fulfill his role as the film’s bonafide hunk. This is a role that Heughan knows well. In addition to his seven-plus seasons on Starz’s super-sexy time-traveling romance adventure Outlander, he’s not averse to stripping down to his pineapple speedos for the Heughligans. So it should come as no surprise that Heughan gives it his all…in a shower scene…singing “It’s All Coming Back to Me” by Celine Dion. Thank you for your service.

But it’s not enough! I’m not saying that Love Again needed Bridgerton-esque sex scenes or even had to go full-on “Rated R.” There are ways to stay PG-13 and still inspire swoons. Maybe if we had at least seen thirty seconds or so of concrete foreplay in between basketball and the next morning, the whole sequence would have felt more rooted in reality. Instead, the quick cut was jarring. It felt manufactured. It felt…not sexy.