If there were ever a moment for Archewell Productions to take a long, hard look in the mirror, this is surely it. The latest venture executive-produced by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, Cookie Queens, hit cinemas with all the fanfare of a damp squib.

Directed by Alysa Nahmias, the documentary follows four determined American Girl Scouts vying to become top cookie sellers – a project Meghan warmly championed, recalling her own childhood days as a Girl Scout with her mother, Doria Ragland, as troop leader. She hailed the film’s “edgy yet humanising tone” as “irresistible”. The box office, however, proved entirely resistible.

Opening across 446 US cinemas, Cookie Queens managed a dismal $327,797 (£257,000) in its opening weekend, according to Box Office Mojo. That works out to a meagre per-screen average of $17,508 (£12,970) – a figure an industry source bluntly labelled a “pretty pitiful return” when speaking to The Times of London. Ouch.

While the American-centric documentary has yet to secure a wide UK release, its performance across the Atlantic, where Meghan’s star power was meant to hold the most sway, is a hammer blow for the Sussex brand.

To rub salt into the wound, the project failed to break into the Top 10 releases. But guess what did? CatVideoFest 2026 – a 70-minute compilation of internet cat clips. Released in nearly half as many cinemas (255 screens), the feline feature comfortably outperformed Archewell’s documentary, taking in over half a million dollars.

When a collection of internet cat videos beats a Hollywood-backed Sussex production on the big screen, you haven’t just missed the mark – you’ve been given a glaring sign.

Distributors at Roadside Attractions – the independent film distribution company that acquired theatrical rights – have put on a brave face, pointing out that niche documentaries often enjoy a “long life” in specialist venues and community screenings. But for a high-profile brand built around star power and global influence, these numbers are impossible to spin into a win.

Since stepping back as senior royals in 2020, Harry and Meghan have poured immense energy into media ventures. However, outside of their initial bombshell Netflix tell-all, public appetite for Archewell’s portfolio – from Polo to Live to Lead – has cooled significantly.

Cookie Queens was supposed to showcase warmth, nostalgia, and authentic grit. Instead, the cold shoulder at cinema box offices suggests the public remains thoroughly unconvinced.

If audiences would literally rather pay to watch cat videos than sit through Archewell’s latest production, the message is loud and clear: it’s time to rethink the strategy.